Sitting in my Special Ed course classes yesterday and today, I realized how much we all view the world from one framework. We all share more or less the same definitions of work, leisure, friendships,intimate relationships. Not only do we share these definitions,we are very entrenched in our certainity of these definitions... and the majority definition is the norm.

Through many of the video clippings I've seen during my 'Disability and Social Development' course, I've come to realize that I know little about love, I know little about commitment, I know little about friendships. All my relationships work in the realm of the known - where the other person and I know what is expected,what are the 'givens' and a predictable negotiation is created.

But what does it mean to love and be married to a man with ADHD-where he finds it extremely difficult to filter out the required stimulus from multiple auditory stimuli? What does it mean to be the mother of a son who is a paraplegic and cannot do anything for himself?

Can we actually be so sure about our definitions of love, success, job-satisfaction, relationship-satisfaction when we have altogether forgotten to factor in the realities of these special people...when we have altogether forgotten to understand what all the above mean to these people and the people in their lives?

Far from 'politically correct' reasons for asking these questions, I ask them because they too are a part of 'Society'. So by default and a very common sense perspective these questions need to be asked,so that the answers that come from these special people may become our answers as well. But the answers are not going to come to us on a silver platter. We need to shed our certainities...we need to look.